Take a bee-line from yesterday: Doubt is okay.
I’d even go so far to say: Doubt is necessary. Because we cannot appreciate confidence and faith unless we are first friends with doubt. It’s the tension of opposites. Cold is so much more bearable when we know the comfort that heat will bring. Emptiness can be endured when fullness is nearby. Scarcity subsides when abundance walks up and rings the doorbell.
But doubt brings feelings of disequilibrium which translates to not-being-in-control. That’s the part I don’t like. Almost everything in this black-and-white world encourages me toward center… to the place where I am in charge. Where I make my own decisions. Where I get what I need to live my life how I want to live it.
But we are about to tip into that time when all of this-black-and-white-living will be turned on its head and toppled into a huge mess of unknowing. What we had known all along in faith will become a muddy bog of doubt. Life will become death and eventually death will turn back into life.
It’s a crazy internal tug-o-war between the head and the heart… between what we know and what we feel… between what we rationally think and what we radically intuit as sacred and true. It can all make you feel nuts sometimes.
Unless we go through the dying we don’t fully understand the gift of rising. But the dying part… that’s just not fun at all. Take my word for it… been there/done that/got the t-shirt. Still… a necessary part of the journey, ugly as it is.
The next time we meet, this tension-of-opposites journey will have begun in earnest. The triumphant celebration of Palm Sunday will give way to a sense of imminent darkness… and we will be thrown back into doubt.
No worries… we look to the rising.
Question of the day: How do you balance the tension?